About me? Well, I'm starting my life over again and it is scary. I'm doing the best with what very little I have been left with and working hard to be independent again.
I have two wonderful children. (the only good thing I got from my marriage) One is on his own and so brilliant working with a major computer company. And my youngest is going to college and working toward her own goals of becoming an entrepreneur. They have become amazing adults and I know there is more to come from them both. I'm very proud of them both!
I hate asking for help, but there comes a time when we all have to give in and let others do what they can for us. I'm afraid I'm at that point :( I hate the fact that I have to depend on my parents when it is time for me to be taking care of them. I hate the fact that I have to come on here and ask strangers to help me financially, but I am desperate - and grateful that this is here to help people like me who find we are at a dead end and need help out.
I had cancer a few years back, it put a stop on everything it seems. I am totally cancer free today :D and trying to get this body back into it's pre-cancer shape lol. My goal is to be completely healthy before I turn 50. It's hard when you dont have the money to buy good food and fill up on carbs to make it through the day. But someday it will all come together and I will be who I should be again.
I live in a small house that is totally falling down. My husband did not take care of the place, he hated doing any kind of work on the house, so now it's up to me to try to find the money to fix the things that have fallen apart. I like doing the work but hate doing it alone, I like to have someone by my side when I do remodel or repair work. And believe me there is a lot to be done here. It seems I am always trying to find money to fix something. I have a bathroom that is totally ruined - the floor is falling in cuz of his crappy plumbing job - so I just keep the door closed hoping some day I can get it fixed. (and yes I do have a 2nd bath)
I have cats and dogs. After the cancer everyone wanted to make me happy so I got puppies and kittens. I guess I needed that unconditional love since my husband had emotionally abandoned me at that time. I love each and everyone, but sometimes I find them totally exhausting. But they are my responsibility (and I love them) and I gladly take care of my responsibilities.
I am desperately trying to get myself independent and get a job. I have found that being a mother and taking care of a home and family for 25 years does not count for much when you suddenly find yourself needing to be the sole support for that home and family. But I would not trade one second of it. I just wish that somehow I could transfer all this knowledge into a degree or an awesome paying job so I can be self supporting.
I hate to ask for money from people but I am at that point in my life where I need to. It makes me cry to think that I now depend on charity from others. I will get my life together and I will repay each and everyone who has helped me through this crisis I am going through. I was just thinking, cancer was not this hard lmao. I guess I felt I had no control over cancer and I cant stop thinking I should have more control over this.
I am just hoping that the kindness of strangers and perhaps the network of people on this blog will see that I am a good person, that I am reliable and intelligent and that I can do anything. Perhaps someone out there can not just help me through the financial problems I am having at the moment but help me get my independence back through an awesome paying job.
Thank you for reading this.
(is it obvious I love to talk? LOL)
